Monday, October 5, 2015

Aversion and Birth Story Part 2

If you missed part one where I shared about the events leading up to my little guy's birth as well as the aversion, click here to read it!

Immediately after our little guy turned, I was wheeled to our own room where we would be staying for the next few days. I had been hoping that the nurse I had when I was in labor with my daughter could be my nurse this time as well, so I requested her. She was on duty that day, which was another answer to prayer, and she was able to switch patients with the nurse assigned to me. She remembered me and was excited to help me bring our little guy into the world. It's important for me to have a nurse that believes in birth being a natural process with as few interventions as possible. She and my hubby make a great midwife and doula team, and the best part is they are both free!

I shared with my nurse my concerns about Pitocin and that I realized that it would make my labor a lot more painful. She reassured me that I could still do it naturally, and that she would use as little Pitocin as possible once my body got the message to go into labor! Since I was still 10 days early, I knew it might take a while to get labor going. I was prepared for another 18+ hour long ordeal.

Around 8:30 the Pitocin was started and I asked for a birthing ball just to help get baby boy down in my Pelvis where he needed to be! The hardest part of this beginning phase was the fact that I was hooked up to the IV and couldn't move around like I wanted to. My doctor also wanted the fetal monitor on the whole time since he had just been turned. She wanted to make sure he didn't go into distress after all the action that morning!

I began having contractions right away but they weren't anything major. Since I wasn't in pain and couldn't go anywhere, I decided it was a good time to get out my Bible and journal. With worship music playing in the background, I had the sweetest time of prayer and writing down verses of promises for my son as well as prayers for his future. One of the verses I wrote for him was Jeremiah 1:5 "Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you, before you were born I set you apart." I knew in my heart that God had big plans for my son and September 15th was just the beginning of watching those plans unfold!

From 8:30 to about 12:30 things moved pretty slowly. The nurse had to turn the Pitocin up higher than I would have liked because my body just wasn't ready. This was hard for me to handle because I would have preferred to wait until things happened naturally. I trusted my doctor, however, that this was what she felt was best for my baby and gradually my contractions got stronger and closer together. I wasn't in a crazy amount of pain yet, however, and that made me feel hopeful about not having to get the epidural. In fact, I told my hubby that I was more hungry than in pain as I hadn't been allowed to eat since 11 the evening before just in case I needed a C-section. The no eating or drinking policy is hard for me to comprehend. I realized it's precautionary, but when going through labor, it would be nice to have energy rather than be starving!

When the nurse checked my cervix at 1PM, I was dilated to a 2, just enough for the doctor to come break my water. Again, I was apprehensive about any interventions, but at the rate my labor was progressing, it seemed like maybe breaking my water would give my body the hint it needed to kick into gear. My doctor also attached an internal fetal monitor because we kept losing his heart beat on the external monitor due to me moving around on the birthing ball.

After my water broke, things got real. I pulled out my Bible verses for labor and delivery that helped me get through labor with my daughter and prayed that God would give me the strength to get through the pain. After my water was broken, I was very uncomfortable, even when I wasn't having a contraction. It hurt to lay down, sit, stand and even being on the birthing ball didn't help this time. With the Pitocin, my contractions started to come less than a minute apart and were awful. I felt like I didn't even get a chance to catch my breath before another one came.

Around 3PM, the nurse checked me again and I was only at a 3. I was so discouraged by my lack of progress that I actually cried. I was so frustrated that in spite of the pain I was in, things seemed to be moving slowly. I started to doubt whether I was going to be able to do it without the epidural this time. My nurse encouraged me that my cervix was completely thinned out so things would move much quicker from this point.

Instead of sitting on the birthing ball, I found that my pain was more manageable to stand/lean through each contraction. I am so grateful to have a hubby who was right there by my side helping me through each contraction even though I know that he hated seeing me in pain. I couldn't have done it without him, that's for sure. Each contraction, I leaned on him and he pushed in on my back to help relieve some of the pressure. He didn't get a break either at the pace the contractions were coming! Finally, my nurse came to turn the Pitocin down and although my contractions were still extremely painful, I got at least a minute or two in between to relax and rest which helped a lot.

At about 4PM, I was so exhausted that I couldn't even stand anymore. I was hungry, tired and in so much pain that I just laid in the bed shaking. I thought I was shaking because I was cold, but looking back, I'm pretty sure that it was the transition phase everyone talks about. The contractions kept coming and my hubby was right there pushing on my back every time and reminding me to breathe and relax. He was awesome. I also focused on the Bible verses I had brought and kept praying for God to give me strength to get through each one.

When the nurse prepared to check me at 5PM, I was ready to throw in the towel. I was exhausted, in so much pain and just ready to be done. I told myself that if I wasn't past a 5 that I would get the epidural so I could rest. As you can only imagine, when she told me I was an 8, I was so relieved that I started laughing!

Knowing how close I was gave me the energy I needed to get through each contraction. And yes, I was screaming and moaning into a pillow at that point. There's just no way to handle that kind of pain with dignity!

After what seemed like an eternity, yet was more like a 30 minutes, I felt like I needed to push. I knew my baby was coming, ready or not! My nurse checked me and said I was ready, but once again, my doctor wasn't there yet! She told me to try my hardest not to push until the doctor got there. Unless you've experienced that, it's hard to explain how difficult that is. It's awful.

When my doctor got there, she said she could already see his head! I pushed through a few contractions and then had to wait because his head was coming out at an odd angle. That period of waiting with him partway out was excruciatingly painful. In fact, his delivery was much more painful than I remember with my daughter. I'm not sure if it's because he was bigger or because he had been breech the whole time, but it was indescribably painful. After a few more serious pushes and admittedly some yelling, my sweet baby was born. He came out kicking, screaming and looking so healthy that his Apgar score was a 10! Praise Jesus!

The moments that followed are a bit of a blur, but I remember I wanted him in my arms right away. The first thing I said when I saw him was "I love you". He looked perfect and I whispered the most heartfelt "thank you Jesus". It just seemed surreal to be holding my son after all we had been through, not knowing if this day would even come. I don't think I took my eyes off of him for a solid 5 minutes. My heart was so full.

The nurse told us right away that he didn't appear to have any physical signs of Down Syndrome, but we would need to wait two weeks for the official blood work to confirm that. It's amazing how at peace I was either way. I was completely prepared to love my son with DS and to love him without, however God saw best.
After over an hour of holding my baby, I handed him off to his proud daddy who had been waiting very patiently for him so that I could use the restroom and change into clean clothes. We were able to spend the first couple hours, just us in the room with him because we had told most family and friends to wait until the next day to come and visit because we assumed he wouldn't be born until much later in the evening! 

We had some of our good friends bring us dinner and we also had our friends from out of town come to visit us the night he was born. Here is a photo of me and my best friend with our baby boys born just 5 days apart. Totally unplanned, but God does cool things!  


The next day, our two year old got to meet her little brother. I wish I could have captured the wonder in her eyes when she first saw him. I don't think she could have been any more excited! She kept asking if he was her baby brother! When I told her "yes" she said "oh he's so cute! I like him!" I hope she always feels that way. Here's our first family of four photo! 

One thing no one warned me about this time were the contractions for days following my baby's birth! With my daughter's birth, they were painful but not nearly as bad as they were this time! The nurse told me it's because my body remembers from the first time and so it contracts much harder and more quickly to get the job done faster! Isn't it amazing how God has made our bodies to recover like that after birth?

Our little guy is still doing well, and in fact gained a whole pound in just his first week. He is already in size 1 diapers and wearing his 0-3 month clothes. I hope he slows down just a bit so I can enjoy his tininess just a bit longer. I'm not taking my time with him for granted, knowing that it is only by God's grace that I have been blessed with a healthy baby.

In regards to his health, he does still have something wrong with his left kidney called Caliectasis. We will be taking him to see a specialist to determine what will need to be done to correct it so we appreciate your continued prayers for complete healing!

Believe it or not, my son's birth story looks nothing like the birth plan I had written down on paper. I didn't want to be induced, and I definitely wanted to steer clear of Pitocin. But in spite of my plans, God showed us that his plans are far better and He worked it all out according to His will for us that day. I am beyond grateful to the Lord for my son. I know that even if God hadn't answered our prayers the way we wanted him too that He would still be good. But I see how much God has been glorified already through this brand new life and we are thankful to the Lord for all of the miracles he gave us on September 15th, especially the life of our son. 
Words cannot describe how much I love this sweet baby boy. I love his soft hair and those dark blue eyes looking up at me, I love his tiny wrinkled toes and his little fingers curling around mine. I love that he has a reflex smile every time I kiss his cheek, I love his new baby smell and him sleeping on my chest. Most of all, I love that he is my son and I get to be his mommy.
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Colossians 3:17 
And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

5 comments:

  1. Such a beautiful baby!! Congrats to you and your family

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  2. So beautiful! God's plan is always so much better. Congrats!!!

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  3. He's absolutely beautiful!!!! He looks so much like Jimmy in the 1 picture! I'm so happy for you all! God is good ALL the time!

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  4. Birth never goes as planned, does it? Yet having a sold plan is such an important part of the process. I am so glad to hear your baby came safely, and wish you all the best (and a very restful next few weeks). Oh, those after birth contractions...they absolutely are worse the second time around!

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  5. Congratulations! He is a beautiful baby. So glad things went well and you trusted God through it all. What a wonderful testimony to your readers and a great love story for sure. Here's to some sleep and happy baby days ahead.

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